Wednesday, July 9, 2014

The end is near, am I ready!?

    I'm to the stage of pregnancy where I am ready to be done.  Four weeks into my third trimester and. . . well this picture I found pretty much says it all. 
Yup thats how I feel.  My daughter asks me to read her stories and I can read one before I feel out of breath.  I have had to ask my husband to help me up when I decided it was a good idea to sit on the floor.  Getting comfortable is darn near impossible and I'm really not sure how much more my belly can stretch.  I know it's too early and I will wait till this baby decides it's time but I can't help but feel ready for this pregnancy to be over.    
    On the other hand however I feel like baby could stay in until 42 weeks.  Im done being pregnant but really can not fathom the idea of having two little children to look after, to care for and nurture.  
    The idea of adding a new little life into our family scares the crud out of me.  Im sure it will be great for the most part at least.  Im sure I will love both girls with all my heart.  I just can't help but wonder how the hell I'm going to to do this.  How am I going to be a mother of two?  How am I going to fulfill the needs of two little girls and keep some shred of my sanity?  Am I really going to be able to give them both all the love and attention that they need?  How is L going to handle being a big sister?  How is my marriage going to handle the newborn stage all over again.  I have all these concerns and more as the birth of our second daughter quickly approaches.  
    My body is telling me the end is near and it's time for baby to come into this world soon.  My mind is screaming "Noooo, we are not ready for this!".  Regardless of whether this child decides to come at 39 or 42 weeks this family will have its new addition soon enough.  I will soon be a mother of two and by the grace of God we will all survive, I suppose.  

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